In the world of reality TV, Kody Brown has often been a figure of controversy and criticism. Known for his polygamous lifestyle and strict rules, he’s frequently been the subject of jest. However, recent events have cast a somber shadow over his public persona. In March 2024, Kody faced an unimaginable tragedy: the suicide of his son, Garrison.

The latest episode of Sister Wives offered a raw and emotional glimpse into Kody’s world of grief. Filmed close to the present day, the episode was a dedication to Garrison, who struggled with alcoholism and depression leading up to his death.

Kody, visibly shaken, shared his raw emotions on camera. “Grief comes in waves. It just wasn’t supposed to be this way,” he said, his voice laden with sorrow. “It’s just heartbreaking.”

The episode revealed the strain in Kody and Garrison’s relationship before his death. Kody’s strict COVID-19 rules had created a rift, leading to a lack of communication between the two. This estrangement has left Kody with a deep sense of regret.

“I didn’t get a chance to really just make things right, just not being able to say goodbye…” Kody confessed, his voice heavy with remorse. “All the frustration I had over stuff with COVID and everything like that, all of a sudden that’s just, like, they’re so unimportant. I’m just sad. Sad about what would have been.”

Kody’s pain is palpable as he grapples with the finality of his loss. In conversations with his wife Robyn, he admits, “It’s like I’ve got to do something different because I could have had more time with him, and I thought there would be more time. Everybody thinks they got more time.”

Since Garrison’s passing, Kody has been determined to bring his son’s ashes back to Wyoming, where most of his extended family is buried. “It’s a pilgrimage in a way, just part of the process for me,” Kody explained. “It’s the only thing I want from it. … I just want to take his body home and put him in the ground.”

In a previous interview with People Magazine, Kody opened up about the profound grief he’s experienced. “The wave of grief is different than any wave of grief I have ever had… It’s different in the idea that it’s irreconcilable — the future that we missed with him,” he shared.

Kody’s regret is a stark reminder of the importance of cherishing our loved ones while they’re with us. “I want to go out to dinner again. I want to sit down. I want to have a beer. I want him to try and make me laugh because he was kind of that way. The only regret is just, gosh, I would just do that more often,” he reflected.

As Kody continues to navigate this heart-wrenching journey, our thoughts go out to him and his family. The loss of a child is an unimaginable pain, and Kody’s candid sharing of his grief serves as a poignant reminder to hold our loved ones close.

Stay tuned for more updates on Kody Brown and his family as they continue to heal and find their way forward. If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, please reach out to the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).